Lizie Snuggles?

Uncle Mike came home for Christmas! I wasn't sure whether I remembered him at first, but I tried him out and decided he was pretty snuggly. Uncle Mike is a win!

Linnea's 3rd Birthday

Look at me! I'm 3! I had my birthday party at Little Gym, and it was SUPER fun! All my bestest friends came to the party. I felt like a true princess!

I had the coolest princess cake!

And since I'm 3 now, I could blow out all the candles all by myself. Yay me!

So, the cake was fun, but playing in the gym was WAY funner!
I got to shake bells and make a bunch of noise...

Then we got to play with a ginormous parachute! Lizie and Mommy helped shake it...

 ...and so did Meemee and Joey.

and I got to play underneath! SO awesome.

Winfield was under the parachute with me. I love Winfield. He's my best friend, and I'm going to marry him someday, and I'm going to wear Mommy's married dress. I make sure to tell Mommy that all the time, so she knows to save her dress for me.

Anyway, next we got to jump like maniacs on the air track. The air track is probably my favorite.

 

 

Ok, the air track was a blast, but opening presents was amazing. I got SO many princess presents! My friends must really know me. I'm super loved.

I even got a hug from Beckett.

What a fun party! I'm so happy to be 3!!

Shopmama Blog #18: Her Prerogative.

9/20/2010

Oh, my feisty Eliza.

Eliza has never been a great sleeper. Since the day she was born, we’ve tried everything to get her to sleep through the night consistently. When we brought her home from the hospital, she slept in a crib with Joey. Joey would nuzzle against her and drift off peacefully. He only woke to eat and would go right back to sleep. He wasn’t huge into fussing. Eliza, on the other hand, was a fuss queen. I’d say she was borderline colicky. Now, this difference in their personalities wasn’t a huge surprise to me. When the babies were in my belly, Joey was always totally mellow. In fact, his heart rate never got quite high enough during my weekly non-stress tests/biophysicals. I always told the nurses, “no biggie, he’s just a mellow dude.” He moved around enough, and was always facing head down – ready to enter the world properly. Eliza, on the other hand, never concerned the nurses. Her heart rate went up and down like a champion, and she moved around like crazy – one week she’d be head down; the next week she’d be breech; the next week we’d find her in a transverse position (horizontal to my body). I knew she’d enter this world with her own agenda. She may be our youngest child, but she’s definitely our strongest…strongest-willed, that is.

Now, despite the myriad of sleep techniques attempted with Eliza, she STILL doesn’t sleep through the night. We have concluded, however, that she sleeps best when she’s alone in the room (we frequently remove Joey when he’s at his wits end with her noise, and put him in a pack ‘n play in our room). It seems Eliza’s incessant talking, whining, and then crying is her way of letting us know it’s her prerogative to have her own room. If she could talk, I feel like she’d flat out say to me, “Mom, I shared the womb. Now I want my own room.” At this point, I don’t know what else to think! She’ll fuss and fuss until we remove Joey from the room…and then she’ll fall right asleep. Is it possible for a baby to exhibit such diva behavior?! In my opinion, yes.

For those of you who have children successfully sharing rooms, I’m super jealous. We’ve tried EVERYTHING to get Eliza to sleep through the night. At this point, my conclusion is that she needs her own room. Tell me I’m crazy! We’re about to remodel our home this winter to add another bedroom…all so Eliza can have her own space. Seriously, am I crazy? I mean, I’m a really (and I mean really) light sleeper. Is it possible Eliza already shares this trait? If we remodel for her and she still doesn’t sleep through the night, I’ll feel like a total boob. Maybe I just need some advice…anyone care to share their thoughts??

Shopmama Blog #17: A la Johnny Cash: "My Own Personal...HELL!"

8/30/2010

I think I know what my personal hell might be…

Shane and I took the kids (including bulldog Ringo) up to our family lake home on the North Shore last weekend. The weather was perfect and we all had a wonderful time. We had fun outings to the Lake Superior Railroad Museum and Duluth Children’s Museum, and went on beautiful walks at Gooseberry Falls and the Two Harbors lighthouse lake walk. We had lunch at the local favorite, Betty’s Pies, and Shane and I also had a fabulous dinner at the New Scenic Cafe. All the kids took decent naps and slept fairly well at night. We even saw a “mommy dear and bambi” right up close! Sounds like heaven, right?! Where does the hell come in, you ask? … … the car ride home.

I’m usually VERY strategic when it comes to things like long car rides with the kids. I try to cover all my bases: play like crazy, eat until tummies are full, fresh diapers and comfy clothes on each child, and leave right before nap time. Well, for the first time in my life as a mother, I went out on a limb and left Two Harbors 1) on a freakin’ Sunday after the busiest weekend I’ve ever seen up north, 2) at a completely random time of day: 5:15pm, and 3) after we’d been warned of very heavy construction traffic. HUGE HUGE mistake. I should’ve trusted my instincts and stayed one more night.

We were about 20 minutes into our drive when we hit the first bout of traffic outside Duluth. Major road construction diverted all the weekend traffic to a measly traffic light, which also happened to be a left-turn. I could’ve walked through Duluth faster. Ugh. The babies most likely would’ve slept, but they didn’t appreciate the stop and go, so they got incredibly feisty…fussing and crying are understatements. So, what should’ve taken us 25 minutes took us about an hour and 15 minutes. That meant we still had a 2.5-hour drive ahead of us. Arg. Could’ve, would’ve, should’ve stayed another night!

So, after we went through all the “down to one lane” construction through Duluth, I thought we were in the clear. I guess I forgot about the other “down to one lane” construction about 30 minutes past Duluth. The babies had FINALLY fallen asleep and Linnea was content watching a movie…and then we hit dead stopped traffic AGAIN! I just waited to hear the first squeal come from the back of the minivan, and it took about 3 minutes. Oh man. I’m pretty sure I tried everything at that point to make the car ride go more smoothly. I gave the babies bottles, fed them Cheerios, made sure they didn’t have stinky diapers, played countless rounds of peek-a-boo, and handed out every toy in the car. When it came down to it, though, there was really nothing I could do. If we stopped, we’d only add more time on the road, and I wasn’t going to pull a Britney Spears by taking my babies out of their car seats while we were driving. We just had to suffer on down the road. *sigh*

Long story short: what is typically a 3-hour drive took us 4.5 hours, and we didn’t get home until 9:30pm. Thank GOD Linnea is such a remarkable child and she didn’t cause much added stress to the ride home. She mostly just sat quietly in her seat and tried to ignore the babies. She even laughed at me when I got stuck between seats on my way back and forth to the babies. So, there you have it… a ridiculous car ride with screaming babies is my current personal hell. I’ll let you know if anything changes.

Shopmama Blog #16: Oh no she didn't...

8/26/2010

So, I had my first “my child just said something that totally embarrassed me” moment today.

Linnea and I went on our first trip to the library this morning. I had to remind Linnea that we talk quietly in the library as we walked off toward the children’s section. I was all excited about sifting through the books, so I didn’t mind that Linnea quickly made a friend and played in a room nearby. I could hear her talking and giggling, so I knew she was having a good time. It was so fun to peak in on her and her new friend. It was hard to believe my baby girl was making friends on her own. It was so cute, I almost lost focus on my mission to find the best books. I didn’t lose my focus, though, until…

Linnea re-entered the main children’s section dancing and singing loudly (to the tune of the conga), “Poo poo on the potty! Poo poo on the potty!” Then she turned to her new friend and said, “like that!” She was clearly teaching her new friend the potty dance we do at home before and/or after a successful poo on the potty. It was totally embarrassing, but completely hilarious at the same time. The adults in the room smiled and laughed; older children pointed and giggled; and all the other toddlers looked intrigued. I’m sure I got slightly red in the face, but whatever. It was a classic embarrassed mommy moment, and it was worth every second.

Shopmama Blog #15: Detail + Confidence = Potty Success

8/8/2010

I started my last blog post by stating that I’m a laid back person, and I’m going to start this one by stating that I am also a detail-oriented person. Strange combination, I know. I never said I wasn’t strange. I always notice the little things. In many ways, being detail-oriented is a total nuisance. For example, I notice when sizes aren’t in order on retail racks, and I often correct them (as if I have the time). You can imagine how difficult it is for me to shop at TJMaxx and Nordstrom Rack! Hmm…I suppose one could argue that this example is more indicative of organizational behavior. Whatever. There I go being detail-oriented again! Yes, I’m very organizational too.

Ok, well, if I didn’t already lose you with that crazy self-description, I’ll get to the point: When it comes to potty training Linnea, my attention to detail has been anything but a nuisance. It has actually helped immensely. It has given me the ability to notice even the slightest change in her facial expression, which has been key in helping her make it to the potty. Now, I’ve been catching these fleeting moments since she was born, and I’ve been asking her if she’d like to use the potty for months, but it was just within the past week that she finally responded “Yes” instead of “NO!” This sudden change in desire has made me wish more than ever that I could read her little mind. What I wouldn’t give to know what finally clicked! She never responded to incentives such as M&Ms, jelly beans, or stickers, so I know it’s not due to incentive. I’ll just assume she decided being wet and soiled doesn’t feel good, and now that she has decent control of her bowel function, it’s more fun to go to the potty.

This is how I found her after she ran up the stairs last night saying, “I have to go pee pee!”

Yep – I almost fell over trying not to laugh as I discreetly took the photo.

So, this potty thing has added a whole new dynamic to our days. I’m always on guard watching Linnea for potty cues. I’m constantly paying attention to her facial expressions, body movements, and behaviors (ex.”hiding” in my closet). I know, I know – as if I don’t have enough to pay attention to already, right?! Don’t get me wrong, I’m still completely a “no pressure” potty trainer, but I feel like it’s my duty to catch the cues and remind her what she’s supposed to do with them. I probably ask her if she needs to use the potty every hour or two. It seems to work perfectly. She hasn’t had an accident in over a week. She has even woken up a couple mornings with a dry diaper. I could hardly believe it. This kid used to soak through overnight diapers all the time. Anyway, I think Linnea and I make a good potty training team. My attention to detail paired with her confident nature works in our favor for this developmental milestone. Overall, this potty training thing has been a smooth process….and, dare I say, kind of fun! I guess God decided to give me a break this time.

Shopmama Blog #14: Baby-proofing

8/1/2010

If you haven’t noticed already, I’m a pretty laid back person. When it came to baby-proofing the house when Linnea was first becoming mobile, I just baby-proofed as needed. Of course I covered all the outlets and gated the stairs, but not much more was required. Linnea just flat out didn’t get into things. She never opened cabinets she wasn’t supposed to open; if she found a foreign object on a shelf or on the floor, she didn’t eat it, but brought it to me; heck, she didn’t even go after Ringo’s water bowl! I never had to move my cleaning products, medications, or make up. We taught her personal possession early, and she just stayed away from things she knew weren’t “Linnea’s.” In fact, even “Daddy and Mommy’s” dusty liquor cabinet is still totally un-baby-proofed and easily accessible. Well, not for long…

I have a feeling Joey and Eliza are going to be into everything. Wait, let me quickly rethink and rephrase that: they are into everything! They just loooove things they aren’t supposed to have. Seriously, isn’t it amazing that babies totally know the difference!? Now, I’m not sure exactly why Joey and Eliza get into more things than Linnea did at their age. I suppose it’s a combination of personality and lack of supervision. When Linnea was 9 months old, she was my only focus. I was with her all the time and supervised every moment. Joey and Eliza, on the other hand, are often left to their own vices. I always keep an eye on them, but I’m also busy doing other things: unloading the dishwasher, doing a puzzle with Linnea, folding laundry, etc. Joey and Eliza simply have more time to get into things. Needless to say, some major baby-proofing has been occurring in our house.

Most of the daily baby-proofing goes on when Joey and Eliza have free rein of the upstairs. Both Joey and Eliza have opened the cabinet under the kitchen sink (cleaning supplies galore), so I’ve started looking for effective cabinet locks. I’ve found Joey with both hands submerged in Ringo’s water multiple times, so Ringo’s water and food are now put away during the day. I also close the bathroom door, because it seems to be their favorite room – ewww. I shut Linnea’s and the babies’ bedroom doors due to Joey’s fascination with electrical cords. Each morning I pull the living room blinds halfway up and wrap the cords out of reach. Eliza’s a huge fan of the blinds; Joey the cords. I do a visual sweep of the main floor to make sure none of Linnea’s “choke-able” toys are laying around. I do a physical sweep (literally with the broom) underneath the kitchen table and in the kitchen to make sure there aren’t any food remnants on the floor. I put away shoes that are left by the back door. I shut the door to the downstairs. Oh, and the biggest manner of baby-proofing done recently was moving our living room couch smack dab in front of the fireplace. Yep, I completely covered the fireplace with the couch. It definitely looks weird, but it keeps Joey and Eliza from exploring the bricks and ashes. That fireplace was a hazardous baby magnet. So, my house has officially become what I always swore it wouldn’t become: a completely child-proofed baby zone…but, hey, I never thought I’d have THREE kids.

Shopmama Blog #13: What "time" is it?

7/24/2010

According to Merriam-Webster, the definition of “time” is: a nonspatial continuum that is measured in terms of events which succeed one another from past through present to future.

Joey and Eliza turned 9 months old yesterday. Part of me believes it completely and the other part of me is dumbfounded. A lot of the time, when I’m in the thick of daily life with the kids, I feel like time just drags. I often find myself saying, “When is this day going to end?” Sometimes living in the moment feels like living in slow motion. Then, there are the days when I say things like, “Wow, that nap went by quickly!” or “Is it really already Friday?” So, “time” in my world is an interesting phenomenon; months past feel like they just happened yesterday, the present feels somewhat stagnant, and the future feels far away. In reality, though, the future never is far away. I guess I live most days with a “take it one day at a time” approach, so when I wake up and the babies are 9 months old, I feel like I’ve received a good morning slap in the face (or something). What?! Joey and Eliza are only 3 months away from being 1 year old!? 1 year old?! That’s crazy. Wasn’t I still pregnant with them…like…yesterday?! Three months seems like a long time (and it feels like it too when I’m living it), but it’ll fly by just like all the previous 9 months. Yikes. I guess I better be careful when I wish for the kids to be school-age.

I think part of the reason the first year of a child’s life seems to go by so quickly is because of the astonishing growth and development rate. I mean, in the first year of life, babies go from being tiny sacks of potatoes to walking, communicating, lively little beings. Does it happen too fast? In my opinion, sometimes it doesn’t happen fast enough, and sometimes it happens WAY too fast. For example, it would be great if Joey and Eliza would start to feed themselves sooner than later. On the flip side, it would be great if they weren’t already climbing the stairs! Also, I’m really looking forward to the day Joey and Eliza really start playing with Linnea. They owe her big time. She has been an amazing big sister.

In terms of the future, I’m anxious and excited to see what it holds. When I run into people with twins, they always tell me that life doesn’t necessarily get easier, it just gets “different.” I can already see the truth in that statement. For sure. There are a lot of developmental milestones in the future that I have no idea how we’ll handle, but we will handle them. We’ll adjust. That’s life. Good thing I don’t have a major aversion to change. For now, I suppose I’ll keep taking it “one day at a time,” but I’ll try to remember to appreciate each moment (no matter how exhausting, wonderful, chaotic, rewarding…).

Shopmama Blog #12: The Power Half-Hour

7/15/2010

Sometimes my life feels so crazy, I literally wonder how I’ll make it through to the next minute. I’ve coined a new phrase for such times. I call it the “Power Half-Hour,” and it is a time during which all hell breaks loose in the house. By “all hell,” I mean everyone is seriously needy at the same time, and the neediness lasts for approximately half an hour. When I’m in the thick of a power half-hour, it feels like it’ll never end. I run around like a chicken with my head cut off, multi-task like a mad woman, and try to remember to breathe as I grind my teeth in frustration…or desperation. Even though power half-hours feel like they’ll never end, they’re always over in a flash. That’s when I sit down, take a lot of deep breaths, fan my shirt (because I’m always sweating by the end of it), and shake my head like “whoa” as I attempt to gather my thoughts.

Tonight I had my most intense power half-hour to date. I knew it was coming too. Linnea had taken a very short nap, which doesn’t bode well for her fuse. Joey was just out of sorts all day, and Eliza was…well, Eliza. She’s unpredictable, and she had taken to blasting extremely high-pitched screams very unpredictably all afternoon. To top it all off, Shane was out for happy hour. All these things were a recipe for disaster.

Joey lost it first in a very un-Joeylike way; he just started crying and wouldn’t stop unless I held him (and even then he was still whining). Eliza was trying to climb me and got really frustrated when she realized I wasn’t a mountain. Let the high pitched screams begin! That’s about when Linnea lost it. She was patient with Joey’s incessant crying, but Eliza’s piercing screams put her over the edge. At that point, Linnea needed my arms too. So, I put a crying Joey down, hugged Linnea and apologized for the insanity..and Joey crawled off at a rapid pace. I put a frustrated Linnea back down and went to retrieve Joey. When I returned with Joey, Linnea was luring Eliza up the stairs. Yes, Eliza was scaling the stairs. Unbelievable. I guess she found her mountain! This girl isn’t even 9 months old yet. Yikes. I put Joey back down and watched him crawl off toward some computer wires as I ran up the stairs to grab Eliza…and the retriever saga continued with on and off crying/screaming/whining coming from at least two children at a time.

So, I honestly don’t remember what I did with Linnea and Eliza while I fed Joey a bottle. I think I put Eliza in an exersaucer in the kitchen, and left Linnea downstairs watching Max and Ruby. Yeah, that’s exactly what I did. I also made sure to turn on the sound machine at full blast while I fed Joey, so he had peace while he ate and drifted off to sleep. Ahhh…one down. I could see the light at the end of the tunnel. I got Linnea situated at the dinner table and popped Snow White into the portable DVD player. I had to give Eliza my car keys to keep her intermittent screams to a minimum while I prepared her dinner. Aaaaaand, the power half hour was over. Linnea was comfortable at the table and I was feeding Eliza. Things were fairly manageable again. Oh, and that’s about the time daddy walked through the door. Of course…

Shopmama Blog #11: How 'bout Safety 2nd?

7/10/2010

A couple weeks ago, on a rainy Thursday evening, my husband and I sat with our neighbors on their deck and shared a bottle (or two…or three) of wine. Our neighbors are also parents of three young children, so we relate on many levels. As the conversation progressed, it inevitably took a turn toward our children. That’s when my neighbor said something that completely resonated with me. She was talking about the transition from one to two children and then from two to three children. She said the transition from one to two children was fairly smooth. It took a good amount of adjustment, but it was manageable. It was the transition from two to three when she realized safety became an issue. She flat out said, “having three children feels unsafe.” Simply said, but it summed up exactly how I’ve been feeling for the past 9 months. It so perfectly described how I feel a LOT of the time as I continue to adapt to daily life with three kids. There are so many parenting “don’ts” that I frequently have no choice but to “do.” Let me give you some examples:

1). I leave all my children playing together unsupervised.

2). When Linnea is in the bathtub, I often step away for a brief moment.

3). I let Linnea play alone in the backyard.

4). I don’t actually strap Joey and Eliza into their high chairs.

5). I leave the kids in the car while I unload groceries.

You get the idea. Now, obviously I do all these things only momentarily. I can always still see or hear the kids from wherever it is I momentarily ran off to, but I also always tell myself: You should know better. Accidents happen in seconds. *sigh*

As a parent, I have to pick and choose my battles each and every day. I constantly remind myself that I’m doing the best I can. I can only protect my children as much as my mind and body will allow…and I just have to find peace in that. I’m only one person (up against 3). Oh, and Eliza and Joey, who are almost 9 months, are now crawling and pulling themselves up onto everything. I’m going to need more of my protective mind and body than ever before. Wish me luck, my friends, wish me luck.

Shopmama Blog #10: The "I HATE" Game

7/8/2010

I consider myself a pretty positive person. My glass is typically half-full, if you will. However, I’ve invented a new game, and it’s called the “I Hate Game.” It is also, I have come to realize, a coping mechanism I’ve developed since becoming a mother of 3 under 3. I play this game when I start to get irritated, or when I’m just in a bad mood. It’s mostly about complaining, but it feels good to unload, and it always ends up making me laugh. It’s kind of hard to explain the rules exactly, so I’ll just give you an example of how I played it recently. I have a feeling you’ll get the gist of it.

After a long, difficult day with the kids, I was washing bottles (the last thing I really felt like doing) and I just flat out said, “I HATE washing bottles.” Saying it out loud felt good, so I continued: “I HATE that the garbage is ALWAYS full.” “I HATE that I’m exhausted and I still have to put all the backyard toys away.” “I HATE it when I buy a dozen eggs to make egg salad, but don’t get around to making it before the eggs expire.”… … … Most of my “I HATEs” begin with the usual not so enjoyable household duties. Then I start getting creative, and that’s when my mood begins to shift. … … … “I HATE it when I’m sitting in church and the old guy next to me has a whistle coming from his nose as he breathes.” “I HATE that when it rains and I walk into a store I’m always the ONLY one with really squeaky shoes.” “I HATE that most elevators have nothing to look at other than the floor numbers – awkward.” “I HATE that I go to Target almost every day, but I still have a hard time finding what I need.” “I also HATE it that I go to Starbucks almost every day, but never know what I want when it’s my turn to order, and then I end up ordering the same thing I always order.” … … …

You can see the direction of these “I HATE” statements, right? Isn’t it interesting how something so seemingly negative can produce such a positive effect?! I always end up laughing, and then I’m much more relaxed. Sometimes I even finish those annoying end of the day household duties with a little smile on my face. After all, once I’m on a roll, I can’t really stop. I keep thinking of funny “I HATEs” and I’m able to go to bed with the giggles, which totally annoys my husband…which makes me giggle even more.

Shopmama Blog #9: Hail the Conquering Hero!

6/22/2010

Mission: Nap Schedule = Accomplished

It took about 7 -8 months, but Joey and Eliza are officially on the two-a-day nap schedule (sometimes 3 for Eliza). Woohoo! Accomplishing this feat is a big deal in mommy world, so I’m giving myself a small pat on the back. It is no easy task to catch the open sleep window, especially with my hands already so full. I have a lot to pay attention to all the time. I had to make catching the sleep window a priority. So, for a long time, I was on my toes watching for sleep cues. It was definitely tricky with two babies. Here’s the incredibly abridged version of how it worked:

Eliza was (and still is) much more predictable than Joey. When she needs sleep, she wants to sleep…and she lets me know it! As long as she doesn’t get overtired, I’m able to put her down and she rolls right over. Joey, on the other hand, is so mellow that it’s hard to catch his sleep window. He’ll just kind of chill until it’s eye rubbing and ear pulling time. That’s when I know he’s really tired, and sometimes it’s too late. In order to get him down, I have to let him cry. Now, it’s obviously ideal to get both babies sleeping at the same time. This is tricky for the morning nap. Joey and Eliza typically wake up for the morning at different times (Joey usually earlier than Eliza by about an hour). Here’s the catch, though…Joey lasts longer awake in the morning. He doesn’t need to go back down for an hour and a half to two hours after he wakes up. Eliza goes back down after an hour. So, almost daily I’m able to get both Joey and Eliza napping for some amount of time between 9-11am. Whether they sleep for an hour or two hours still varies. Oh well…

The afternoon nap is really where the “conquering hero” comes into play. Yep, I’m able to get ALL THREE babies down at the same time! Toot Toot (that was my own horn). After Joey and Eliza wake up from their morning nap, they’re good to go for about 2-3 hours. I wear them out by taking them on outings with Linnea, or we just play at home. When lunch time comes around, I get everyone fed and changed, and put them all down. YES! I finally have a little “me” time during the day. Fabulous. Oh, and I should admit…I do have a summer girl. There’s NO WAY outings would occur on a regular basis without an extra set of hands.

So, there you have it. No, it wasn’t easy, and, yes, I left a LOT out. Naps are a daily challenge. The naps still vary, but for the most part, the babies are on a schedule. It makes my life feel somewhat less chaotic, and I get the best out of both babies when they’re well-rested. All the hard work is worth it. It feels GREAT when my babies wake up happy. It’s almost like I’ve napped too!

Shopmama Blog #8: Mommy Neuroses

6/6/2010

So, I’m starting to think I’m becoming slightly (ok, maybe a little more than slightly) neurotic. I’m using the term loosely, of course, as a diagnosis for my growing list of “mom-ish” pet peeves. Now, these pet peeves cause me fairly significant emotional stress at their occurrence. Before I had children, I probably wouldn’t have even blinked an eye at such occurrences. It’s amazing how parenthood changes us in SO many different ways. You’re probably wondering about these pet peeves…here’s a short list:

1). Solicitors ringing my doorbell during nap time. Why this bothers me: It’s loud and my bulldog goes ballistic. Getting all three babies asleep at the same time is like winning an Olympic gold medal (so I would think). When there is a taped sign over my doorbell that says, “don’t ring,” I expect NO ONE to ring my doorbell…especially during nap time. Common sense, solicitors, common sense.

2). Drivers that tailgate. Why this bothers me: I’m driving a minivan, which obviously means the likelihood of children in my car is high. Not to mention the two infant car seats that are clearly visible through the back window. Also, I’m not an overly cautious driver. I keep up with traffic and I’m respectful of the left-hand “fast” lane rules. There should be no reason to tailgate my minivan.

3). Cheetos and/or cheesy snacks. – ’nuff said.

4). People who bring their unruly children to not so child-friendly places (nice restaurants, salons, etc.). Okay, if your sitter cancels on you at the last minute and you absolutely HAVE to bring your child, fine…but don’t act like he/she has a right to disturb the peace. Be apologetic, and if it gets really bad, leave. Don’t punish those of us who did pay a sitter. Oh, and don’t pretend you’re unaware your children are unruly. Chuck E. Cheese’s was invented for a reason.

5). The upsell at the drive-thru. Why this bothers me: I’m usually short of time when going through the drive-thru, and often have crying babies in the back. It’s fast food, for gosh sake. I know what I want. You don’t need to try to sell me your Angus Deluxe Burger, and then cut me off when I start talking by switching to the real drive-thru dispatcher. Annoying.

So, there you have it. I sound like a meanie, but these are [some of] the things that drive me crazy now that I’m a mommy. Hey, nobody’s perfect, right?! I could also go on to list all the things I’ve become obsessive compulsive about since having children. Darn mommy neuroses…

Shopmama Blog #7: ...and to Cap it all off

5/28/2010

::Trend Alert:: What’s the newest trend in baby accessories? The elusive CranioCap. What, might you ask, is that? And, where can you get one?! Allow me to enlighten you. According to www.gillettechildrens.org, the definition of “craniocap” is “a cranial orthosis custom-made for your baby.” In layman’s terms, it’s a helmet for babies with flat heads. Now, this flat head thing is a fairly new medical issue in baby world, and it’s happening mostly because of the “back is best” movement. In most cases, it’s not a major issue and it’s easily correctable. The long and short of it is this: some babies come into the world with a preference for lying on one side of the head. Since it is now recommended to place babies on their backs to sleep, a growing number of babies are developing flat spots on the preferred side. The CranioCap was created to ensure infant cranio-perfection (among other things).

So, as if I don’t have enough on my plate these days, BOTH Joey and Eliza are now sporting the helmet look. This adds some daily helmet maintenance and baby washing to my already busy routine. Great. If I have to remember to do ONE more thing in my day, I might lose my mind completely. In fact, I’m pretty sure I’m still working on losing the pregnesia from this past pregnancy. I have my fingers crossed that this helmet stage will be as short-lived as possible.

In all honesty, though, it’s not that bad. It didn’t take long for Joey and Eliza to get used to wearing the Cap (for 22 hours a day), and it’s already starting to work it’s magic. It’s also kind of nice the babies’ heads are protected from the occasional topple-over from their newest skill, sitting up. Oh, and they’re also protected from the occasional (not so gentle) love taps from big sister Linnea. Plus, it’s kind of fun to run into other mommies of helmeted babies while running errands…always sparks interesting conversations.

Anyway, just when I’m thinking, ‘jeez, God, could you put one more thing on my plate?’ I remind myself that I’m lucky. I’m lucky to have two healthy, strong babies. In reality, there could be MUCH more on my plate. I’m extremely thankful I have happy, healthy babies that are headed to perfection.

Shopmama Blog #6: Everyone Loses it Sometimes

5/3/2010

Back in February, my husband started asking what I’d like for my birthday. Did I want a party? No. Did I want dinner with friends and/or family? Eh. I told him I’d like a night in a hotel…BY MYSELF. He wasn’t all that pleased by the “by myself” part, but I think he understood. Well, as it turns out, I got my birthday present early. Here’s the story:

Mid February I had my one and only (to date) complete meltdown since the birth of the babies. I called my husband at about 11am and told him I was “done.” I couldn’t take the crying. My patience level, which is typically very high, was worn to zero (or maybe even negative). I was tired, frustrated, and I had just plain had it. I was snapping at Linnea, which I knew was unfair, but I was completely out of deep breaths and counts to 10. Heck, I even snapped at poor Ringo (the bulldog).

After I was done with my ranting and raving, I hung up the phone, and tried to compose myself. I had to get through the day somehow. About 30 minutes later, my husband called back and said, “I’ll be home in a hour. Pack your things. You’re done for today and you’re staying at The Westin tonight.” Though I hadn’t outright asked for one, my husband knew I needed a break. Thankful as I was, I was also stunned by the surprise. I’m not going to lie, getting everything ready at the drop of a hat to go away for the night wasn’t exactly easy. My mind raced with the following thoughts: Will Shane be able to handle all three babies by himself? Maybe I should call his mom to come help. It would be nice if Shane could meet me for dinner. When did I pump last? Will the babies have enough milk? I guess I could pull some out of the freezer. Oh, I’ll have to bring my pump and breastmilk storage bags to the hotel tonight. What will Linnea have for dinner? I think we’re out of fruit. Maybe I’ll stop at the grocery store and bring something home before I head to the hotel. Jeez, do I even have any clean clothes? What will I wear if I go out to dinner? I might just have to pick something up and eat it in the hotel room, or get room service. Nah, too expensive. I wonder if I have time to do a load of laundry. Oh, but I don’t dry my jeans anyway. Ugh. ….. I could go on and on, but I’m guessing you get the point.

So, I left the house at 3pm. My first stop…Hot Mama, of course! I figured I’d solve my ‘no clothes’ problem. I was expecting to drop a significant chunk of change at Hot Mama, so I called my husband to get the okay. He hasn’t ever actually said, “no,” but I think he appreciates the call. It makes him feel respected and important. Anyway, I ended up getting a couple tops and a new pair of William Rast jeans. On a side note, William Rast: larger waist + smaller legs = great post-pregnancy jeans. Hudson Jeans also fit this category. I tried on clothes and chatted with the girls for an hour and a half and was on my way. The rest of my evening included dinner with Shane and Linnea at Crave (who wants to eat alone?), a nice, hot bath, and a champagne toast to my freedom. Aaahhhhhhh.

I loved my alone time. It was refreshing and much-needed. I was a version of my former self for a night and it felt good. I highly recommend it. Yes, it takes letting go of control at home, and it might also take a little re-prioritizing and some household budget adjustment, but it’s WELL worth it. I mean, don’t put a price on your sanity, people! As Mufasa puts it in The Lion King, “Remember who you are.” I believe if we remember who we are, we don’t completely lose it. Sometimes remembering means being by yourself. Make it happen. As I got in my car to return home the next morning, I took a deep breath and I told myself, “I’m a mother of 3 under 3 and I CAN DO THIS.” …haven’t had a meltdown since.

Shopmama Blog #5: From Dinner until Dusk...

4/22/10

My original plan for this post was to write about 1 hour of my day, specifically 6-7pm. As the events of 6-7pm unfolded, I decided to tweak the plan and extend the time slot by half an hour. This allowed me to start with dinner time and end with the bed time routine. I figured it might be more interesting to read how I multitask and complete this busy time of day (on my own – it’s Daddy’s night out). Here goes:

6:00pm – I’m returning from a 20-minute walk with the kids. I have Linnea and Eliza in the double stroller and Joey in the Baby Bjorn (yes, traffic stopped at the mere sight of us). The bouncers are still outside from earlier outdoor play, so I take Joey out of the Baby Bjorn, put him in a bouncer and bring him inside. Next, I take Eliza out of the stroller, put her in the other bouncer, and bring her inside. I go back to get Linnea, but she wants to stay outside. I say, “Mommy’s going inside. Bye bye, Linnea!” It FINALLY works…she decides she doesn’t want to be left alone, and follows me through the back door.

I take Linnea’s shoes off and start the process of getting Ringo (our bulldog) his dinner. Yes, I’m feeding the dog first. Everyone else is content, so why not? First, though, I really need a glass of water. Linnea is no longer content, so I pull out the portable DVD player and pop in Sleeping Beauty. I decide to start Linnea’s dinner. Lets make it easy – yogurt. Poor Ringo is watching and looking at me like ‘what?!’ Eliza starts getting fussy, so I give her a binky and that quiets her down. Ok, back to Ringo’s dinner. I put a hot dog in the microwave and go to the pantry for his dog food. Joey is fussing now, so I go to the living room and get him a toy. Ringo grunts and lies on the floor like ‘whatEVER.‘ Now, back to the darn hot dog. I have to cut Ringo’s hot dog into tiny pieces and mix it into his regular food (otherwise he won’t eat – yea, high maintenance). Oops, I’m distracted again by Linnea. I’ve forgotten to actually start her movie, and now she wants mac n cheese. So, I prepare the rest of Linnea’s dinner and get her situated to eat. I finally get back to Ringo’s dinner and he’s eating too.

Joey has completely lost it and is crying, so I put him on the activity mat. Linnea and Ringo are eating, Joey is on the activity mat, and Eliza is still in the bouncer. I load and run the dishwasher and tidy up the kitchen. “What’s that? More water, Linnea?” No problem…I even manage to stop and smile with Eliza for a minute on my way back to tidying the kitchen. Then, I remember I need to clip Eliza’s nails (gotta keep ‘em super short or she’ll gouge her face). Nails clipped. Piece of cake. Linnea’s done with dinner. We go to the bathroom to wash her hands and brush her teeth. Eliza is starting to lose it. I move her to the activity mat. All babies are content again (momentarily).

6:30pm – I return to the kitchen and wash about 5 bottles. When I’m finished, I get Ringo more water, and head off to change Joey and Eliza into their pajamas. Linnea and I have a major conversation about Disney princesses and their princes while I change Joey and Eliza (oh, and Eliza has a complete blow out and gets poop all over – classic). When Linnea sees Eliza’s explosion, she informs me she’s “poopy too.” Thanks, Linnea, as if I didn’t smell you.

7:00pm – As I’m cleaning and changing Eliza, Joey is getting more and more hysterical in his crib. Clearly he doesn’t appreciate being put in his crib without being fed first. Oh, Joey. I tell Linnea to go put away her puzzles while I feed Joey. She trots of happily (mind you, she still hasn’t been changed…poor kid). Eliza actually falls asleep while I’m feeding Joey. Wow. So, I tell Linnea it’s her turn…then Eliza wakes up fiercely. Sorry, Linnea, you’re going to have to wait. My beautiful, wonderful, gentle, quiet, patient 2.5 year old daughter hardly whines. Seeming wise way beyond her years, it’s as if she knows it won’t help to throw a tantrum. Thank you, my precious precious child. Linnea comes into the nursery while I’m feeding Eliza. Joey is already asleep in the crib and Eliza is halfway through her bottle with her eyes closed. Linnea looks up at me with tired eyes and whispers, “Nea’s turn?” What I wouldn’t give to scoop her up into my arms and attack her with kisses. Making her wait is torture, especially since she is being SO good about it. I just want to praise her and thank her profusely for acting like a big girl. I whisper back, “Eliza’s almost done. Just a few more minutes.” Keep in mind, I’ve already said this to Linnea about 20 times. Linnea stands in front of me, places her head in my lap, and rocks back and forth with me as I rock Eliza. I’m feeding Eliza with one hand, and scratching Linnea’s back with the other as my heart completely melts.

7:20pm – It’s finally Linnea’s turn. I change her diaper (by now she needs Desitin) and put on her jammies. Then, I realize I haven’t put clean sheets on her bed yet. Ugh, one more thing to do. So, Linnea is STILL patient as I quickly make her bed. I guess everyone big and small appreciate clean sheets! We go get her milk, warm it up, and head to our chair to read some books. We read 4 books and walk to her room together. I turn out her light and turn on her sound machine. We say her prayers. I say, “good night, my little love. I love you SO much.” She says, “Nite nite, Mommy. I love you.”

7:30 – My babies are all quiet. It’s MY turn now.

Shopmama Blog #4: Breakin' the Rules

4/13/2010

I am not proud to admit that I have officially broken just about every Hot Mama rule. I never thought I’d be that mom…and then I had twins. I literally don’t have time to take care of myself. I’m just not a priority, and I’ve come to the conclusion that it’s just the way it’s going to be for a while. Yes, I feel bad about it occasionally, but I remind myself that these early years of my babies’ lives will go by in a flash. Then I’ll have time to refocus and be “me” again. Oh, and if you’re wondering how I’m even writing this blog post…Linnea is in her room calling for me (she’s supposed to be napping), Eliza is asleep in her crib, Joey is next to me in the swing watching Baby Einstein, and I’m pumping as I type with one hand and hold/eat my sandwich with the other (doesn’t make for fast typing, but it gets the job done).

Becoming a parent involves sacrifice and adjustment. It’s part of being responsible for another life. So, overall, I’m okay with breaking the rules. It’s only temporary anyway. I’ll be that mom for a while. Now, let me count the ways:

1). I no longer shower on a daily basis. I’m lucky to shower every other day…and shaving, what’s shaving? I’ll have to figure this one out before shorts season is here to stay. When I do shower, I no longer dry and straighten my hair. It goes right into a ponytail.

2). I rarely (and I mean rarely) put on makeup. It was difficult to give up my makeup, but at the end of the day, it annoyed me to have to take it off. I’d rather have the extra couple minutes of sleep. Before bed, I would stand at the bathroom sink listening to my husband already sawing logs in bed. I literally got mad at him and his zzzzz’s. It wasn’t fair that he didn’t have to wash his stinkin’ face. Sayonara makeup! Now, that’s what I call anger management.

3). My designer clothes I so proudly collected working at Hot Mama have been banished to my “second closet,” a hanging rack in the basement storage area. Ok, that might be a slight exaggeration…I haven’t let go of my designer jeans. I can’t let go of my designer jeans. So, hooded sweatshirt (to hide my still 5-month pregnant-looking belly), William Rast jeans, and running shoes. That’s me. EVERY day.

4). I no longer get dressed up for nights at the theater. Instead, I’m dressed down for matinees of Nickelodeon Presents Live!

5). I didn’t want to go out for my birthday. I actually really wanted a new vacuum cleaner for my birthday.

6). I drive a mini-van. Now, I apologize if this comes across as incredibly ungrateful and vain, but I’m not thrilled (understatement) that I drive a mini-van. Everyone said it would grow on me. It hasn’t. For some odd reason, I’ve always loved looking “cute” in my cars. I’ve always appreciated feeling sporty as I cruise down the road. Now I pull up in a bus filled with babies…definitely not a head-turner and far from sporty. *sigh*

7). My US Weekly and People magazines are piling up and collecting dust. I looked at this week’s cover (Justin Bieber) and was like, “who the heck is that?” and “what’s wrong with his hair?”

8). More often then not, my dinner is cold by the time I get to eat it.

9). I’m always up to my elbows in laundry.

10). My nightly prayer almost always includes something along the lines of “please bring my babies peace and a restful night sleep!”

I suppose the list could go on and on, but I’ll stop. I need to go stop Linnea from banging whatever she’s banging against the wall in her room. Eliza is waking up from her nap and crying (thankfully Joey finally fell asleep). I’m finished pumping, so I’d like to eat my sandwich using both hands … and … oh, I need to let the dog out.

Shopmama Blog #3: Breast Intentions...Read at your own discretion

3/30/10

To breastfeed, or not to breastfeed: that is the question.

It bugs me that women feel pressured to breastfeed. It’s annoying and unfair that there’s a social stigma attached to women who choose not to breastfeed. You may argue whether such a stigma exists, but deep down, you know it does.

Breastfeeding didn’t work for me. I wanted to nurse my first child. In fact, I was all gung-ho about it, but no one told me it might not come easily. I worked with lactation consultants in the hospital. We pulled, stretched, squished, rubbed, and shoved my breasts to no avail. It was just too hard for me to watch my baby squirm, cry, and be frustrated with my ‘inefficient’ breasts. I decided to pump instead, and I ended up pumping successfully for 7 months. However, to an extent, I still felt like I’d failed. I could’ve tried harder. I should’ve tried harder. So, when I had the twins, I decided to give it another go. I worked with lactation consultants in the hospital. We pulled, stretched, squished, rubbed and shoved my breasts. We tried shields and softshells. The babies got frustrated and cried. I had more patience this time around, but I didn’t have new breasts. I eventually got frustrated too. The feeling of failure started creeping its way back until one lactation consultant finally said, “this just might not work for you…and that’s okay.” I ended up choosing to pump again. In no time, I was a milk-producing machine. I pump mass amounts of milk. Literally. My record is 24oz in 25 minutes (and this has happened more than once). My average is 18-20oz in 20 minutes. The proof is in the photo:

My babies are now 5 months old and I keep up with their eating habits just fine. I’m not saying pumping is the most convenient activity, especially with two babies and a toddler running around, but it works for me. Yes, I still feel slightly inadequate at times. I find myself explaining why I’m pumping and not breastfeeding. Why does it matter? It’s disappointing that I’ve second guessed myself so many times because of a stigma. No mother should ever feel such inadequacies. As parents, we make choices we hope we can handle. We do the best we can for our children. I sometimes wonder whether my babies will be scarred from lack of skin-to-skin bonding, but then I look at my beautifully well-rounded, self-confident, amazing toddler, and I know I made the right decision. I’m confident my decision to pump was right for the twins too. Either way, they’re still gettin’ the best of me!

Shopmama Blog #2 Bringing Home Babies

3/17/2009

It’s funny how much more laid back I was about the babies in the hospital than I was when Linnea was born. When we were still in the hospital with Linnea, she never left our room. Nursery…what nursery? I wasn’t about to put my precious new baby girl in the nursery! That is not to say I wasn’t tired from 36 hours of labor and then emergency c-section, and I wasn’t blatantly disregarding all the advice I was given about utilizing the nursery. I just couldn’t get over the guilty thought of her being strolled down the hall by some strange nurse. Oh, how my guilty thoughts diminished…Joseph and Eliza spent plenty of time in the nursery. In fact, one of the days the nurse had to call my room and remind me it was time to try feeding my babies again! Man, did I feel sheepish! I suppose that’s one perk of having twins second (and third). I’m able to be far more relaxed with the babies than I would’ve been if they were my first (and second).

Before I write about bringing the babies home, I should admit that I really didn’t have much to worry about. Yes, I was concerned about how Linnea would accept the babies, but Linnea is a remarkable little toddler. I truly believe she understands certain things far beyond her level of 2-year old reasoning. She was so amazing about welcoming the babies into the family, I could hardly believe it. I kept thinking it was her calm before her storm, but, thankfully, the storm never came. She declared herself “big sister,” and has assumed the role beautifully.

Anyway, as far as not having much to worry about goes…I’m referring to the amount of help we had right after the babies were born. My mother stayed with us overnight for the first week, and then we had a night nanny come 3-4 times a week (and my mom still came on the nights the nanny wasn’t there). My husband’s parents helped out too, as well as my dad and his wife. We had oodles of help. Friends and family brought unbelievably tasty meals on a nightly basis. We ate like kings. I wasn’t alone with the babies for the entire first month. I probably had more sleep than most singleton new moms. I was/am very fortunate and incredibly appreciative.

So, here’s my generic advice to any new parents out there (especially parents of multiples): accept all the help that is offered to you. Having a new baby or babies can be overwhelming. There is no reason to play superparents when you might not be feeling all that super. There is no reason to do it all by yourselves if you don’t have to. Also, invest in a night nanny. It doesn’t come cheap, but it’s WELL worth it. Let me know if you need a recommendation!

Shopmama Blog #1: The Heck You Say...TWINS?!?

Hi, I'm Heather, and I'm the mother of a toddler and newborn twins...and, yes, that was supposed to be read like a support group introduction. On October 23rd, 2009, my life changed drastically. Joseph Henry and Eliza Ann were born, and made my comfortable family of three a busy family of five. Yes, the babies were conceived naturally. No, twins do not run in my family. Needless to say, it was a HUGE surprise. Allow me to start at the beginning...

When I was 12 weeks pregnant, I went to my doctor’s office for the 1st-trimester screen. I didn’t care all that much about the actual tests. To be honest, I just wanted the ultrasound. My doctor doesn’t order ultrasounds for healthy pregnant women, so with my first child, I only had one ultrasound at 20 weeks. I knew I couldn’t wait that long the second time around (and I WAS feeling unusually large), so I decided to take the screen. When the technician put the “wand” on my belly, here’s what I saw:

So, if that’s not totally obvious, I don’t know what is! Twins. Unbelievable.

Now, I’m going to be brutally honest here…this photo didn’t thrill me. In fact, it terrified me. My husband and I hadn’t planned on another pregnancy. I wasn’t even sure if I wanted another baby! Of course a million thoughts ran through my head, but mostly all I could think was, ‘man, were in for it.’ Oh, and I should also add that I’d thought I’d jinxed myself. My whole life (until I had my daughter and discovered what it was like to have ONE baby) I’d always said, “I want twins.” Well, really now, it never crossed my mind that I could have twins as my second and third children! Jeez.

The next few months passed without complication. My blood pressure was never higher than 112 over 62. I hadn’t gained too much weight. The babies consistently passed their biophysical and non-stress tests. At one point, my doctor even called me a “pregnancy champion.” I was extremely grateful I was able to be up and about, “running” around after my daughter, Linnea. This was all fantastic, but I was still very apprehensive about the impending doom…oops, I mean arrival of the twins.

I know most soon-to-be parents are delighted about their pregnancy and ecstatic about the baby’s arrival. I was the polar opposite. As I mentioned, I was terrified. I was SO worried about Linnea and what this would do to her perfect little world we’d created together. Also, we’d have to re-budget, remodel Linnea’s playroom into the babies’ room, load up on more baby gear, buy a freakin’ MINIVAN…etc, etc. Our world was going to change, and I wasn’t sure I was okay with it. I rested on my belief that God doesn’t give me more than I can handle (but he was definitely testing me to the highest degree).

Fast forward to October. Here I am in all my 38 weeks pregnant-with-twins glory the week I delivered:

Ok, I think it’s time to make a REALLY long story short. Introducing Joseph Henry and Eliza Ann:

Joseph Henry - Born 12:02pm * 7lbs 2oz * 20 1/4in

Eliza Ann – Born 12:04pm * 5lbs 10oz * 19 3/4in

Well, that’s my story (in a nutshell). I’d love you to join me as I write about adjusting to life with a toddler and newborn twins. There will be ups and downs, and backs and forths, and probably some sideways too. I welcome all kinds of feedback: comments, criticisms, suggestions, and advice. I’m amazed each day by how much there is yet to learn about parenthood. A lot of the time, YOU will be my connection to the outside, “adult” world…at least until the weather warms up and we’re able to come out from winter hibernation.

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